A Myriad of Firsts: Patagonian Backcountry Skiing

Have you ever been in wind so strong it blows your tent flat? Wait, scratch that, have you ever been in wind so strong it blows your 4 season expedition tent completely flat on top of you in winter while you pray the wind hasn't broken your skis in half as they stick halfway out of the snow outside your tent? Welcome to the first day and night of my first Patagonian backcountry skiing trip!


Have you ever skied fresh tracks 400 vertical meters of fresh blower powder in a couloir under a gigantic full moon? Welcome to night 2 of my first Patagonian backcountry ski trip!


The 3 day wasn't quite as epic....oh wait yes it was! My biggest vertical relief I've ever skied (yet)! 700 plus vertical meters of face shots and giggling my way down a massive bowl linking turn after turn after turn! Looking back up and seeing a bright big blue sky over top of my gorgeous “S” turns! Is this for real?


Just shy of the pass in the Cerro Castillo National Reserve, we made camp for 5 days of avalanche training, and amazing skiing! Thinking back on my experience of my first backcountry trip in Chile, I can hardly believe it was real. The tips of my toes haven't quite come completely back to feeling, but I can still feel the bite of the freezing wind as I scream down powder lines experiencing elation I didn't think was possible! I'm addicted.


Waiting out a rest day, watching the weather, trying to keep warm in minus 7 degree weather, sitting through heavy case studies of past avalanches, I can't wait to get back out skiing! A few more days of backcountry skiing, one more in the resort for an end of the week dump, then avalanche review and testing and debrief and my first ski course for GS8 will come to an end. Fortunately more fun will follow....10 days of hard ice climbing and instruction after which we will slog onto the Ice Cap for a month of mountaineering madness few in the world have experienced!



Can I wait for it all? Not really, but it will all unfold one step at a time!

Powder Skiing and the Waiting Game

Skiing 40 cm of fresh powder is almost as fun as a ten year old with free reign of Disneyworld. Actually, I have no idea if that's fun at all, but I DO know that skiing 40 cm of fresh powder is quite an elating experience! The literal ice sheet that we skied on earlier this week is only a distant memory! We are all getting better at skiing! Some of the guys doubling their experience with the two days we've been, and others of us able to shred the entire mountain searching for as many fresh new runs as possible! I've never really skied trees before, or at least with much success, and now I can't stay out of them! Tree skiing is super fun for many reasons, but, as you can imagine, also tends to have more dangers than skiing wide open runs!


I've been looking forward to our first backcountry skiing trip for a while! In fact, I actually took a shower for the first time since getting down to Chile in anticipation of this trip! We were supposed to leave this morning, but, as luck would have it, because of the volatility of Patagonian weather we've had warm temps and its been dumping rain at the elevation we were intending to go. Therefore we are sitting here at basecamp twiddling our thumbs watching ski videos trying to keep our stoke up for the impending wet few days we are expecting to have while drilling our avalanche rescue skills in the rain!


Speaking of sitting around doing whatever you can to fill the time waiting out nasty weather, GS7 (guide school 7) was supposed to leave to do their advanced mountaineering course on the ice cap a week ago! Due to forecasted 3 meters of snow accompanied by up to 140km/hr winds for days on end, they have been stuck here at basecamp going out of their minds! And so it goes as the life of a mountaineer in the illustrious Patagonian mountains! Even the lift at the local ski resort shuts down through out the day for an hour or so due to high winds and zero visibility! Needless to say, there is a very distinct reason this region is said to have some of the worst weather on the planet! What better a place than here to cut our teeth training to be mountain guides! Understanding what it means to suffer coupled with being able to make sound decisions for the sake of the safety of the group are paramount for being a guide of any sort in the mountains! Its sounds weird to say I’m looking forward to our suffer fest here in Patagonia, but strangely, I am. I have been looking forward to this for as long as I can remember! I heard a quote by a prominent mountaineer that has stuck with me for a long time, “Alpinism is the art of suffering” and yet here I still am seeking after this as a lifelong goal! And as some of you might have heard me say before...”we didn't get dressed up for nothing!”

Ice Skiing in Patagonia

Skiing on ice is terrible. Skiing on ice in high winds with powder skis and tech bindings is far worse than terrible! Thus was my experience on my first day of my ski course here in Patagonia!


Let me back up...saying the skiing was worse than terrible sounds a bit harsh, but no one would have chosen to ski in these conditions unless you had to. In fact the ski “resort”, called El Fraile located here just outside of the town Coyhaique, Chile, wasn't even open. And to be completely honest, I had a fantastic time, and here's why: If you love to ski, as I do, coupled with smiling faces of friends, skiing in August (a phenomenon for us who normally reside in the northern hemisphere) and a lifty that only knew one English word, “lunch”, and kept saying it over and over again because he really didn't have any idea what that one word meant, you get pure joy!



Unfortunately, that joy was short lived as the following two days the resort was closed and our instructors saw no point in going up to ski in windy, icy, and over all quite dangerous conditions. So we have been pounding out some avalanche curriculum previously slated for later this week. Hopefully we will be getting some snow coming in this week and be able to ski some decent snow at the resort before we head out for a couple different multi-day backcountry skiing excursions!

Thoughts from far above the earth...(aka a blog written while flying :) )

Some consider me well traveled, and to someone who has never left their home country, I am. I have traveled to and spent time in 15 different countries, but have never dipped below the elusive equator and explored any parts of the southern hemisphere...today I win the game of chicken I've been playing with South America. I am flying south to the southern end of the skinny coastal country of Chile. I will finally get fresh stamps in my new, naked, neglected passport. I was proud of my old passport because it was well worn. It had a plethora of stamps from Latin America and from all over Eastern Europe. Most people never even come close to filling a passport with stamps and end up being proud of the one or two bits of “traveling” they've done to westernized countries or cities, claiming they have the knowledge, perspective, and the experience of someone who has been overseas and “seen the world.” Its true that someone can get a glimpse of another culture from tasting true local cuisine, or shopping in an open air market in the center of town. But its just a glimpse and not a very good one at that (usually). How many of them retreat to the comfort of their air conditioned hotel room when the 100 plus degree weather starts to beat down on them? How many people keep their “valuables” in a “secret” travel belt so they don't get pick-pocketed? How many people put away their preconceived notions of what is “safe” to eat and eat at the locals food stand. How many people go to a poverty stricken country, a war ravaged land, or a humanity raped culture with thoughts of grandeur because they are going to “help” those people? If we continue to experience “cultures” the way we think they should be rather than how they actually are, or try to “fix” them according to our own beliefs or values never to return again, how is that experiencing anything other than another rendition of our own selfish realities simply filtered through a 3D mirage of a week long “vacation” or “mission”?


My mom is the Director of World Missions at her church in Salem, where I grew up. I love my mom more than anything in the world...shes my mother, why wouldn't I? She is one of the most well traveled individuals I have ever known. She doesn't travel to popular places, stay at resorts, or frankly doesn't even enjoy some of the trips that she goes on. Nor does she go to try to fix the world with her religion claiming that they are simply lost souls needing to convert to her way of thinking or her own personal convictions. She goes in support of people who live there, she develops personal relationships with people and builds on those relationships even after her short visit, in order to serve them better. My mom and I do not always see eye to eye on a lot of life’s finer points, but I respect her for the work that she does. I respect her for going out of her comfort zone and doing what she does, loving on people in a way she describes as sharing the love of Jesus and sharing it with people who may not know that anyone in this world (or any other world) loves them. Its not a forced “you must believe what I believe” type of thing...I truly believe that regardless of the title of what her teams go under or the specific reasons or goals they may have, they are there to spread love. Who can argue with that?


I am flying to Chile, under the banner of a Mountaineering School that I am attending, but that doesn't mean that I can't spread the love that I have received in my life with the people that I come into contact with. In fact, I think it is important to love people no matter where you are, who you are with, or what you've experienced in life. You may have a lot of pent up anger, a boat load of bottled up potent hatred that you are bound and determined to hold onto for some reason... but why? We have ALL been wronged in some fashion or another. Some of us have been lied to, some of us have been betrayed, some of us have been cheated, some of us have had people we care about taken away seemingly prematurely and unfairly, some of us have been beaten, and some of us have been raped. These are terrible, awful, horrendous wrong doings that have no excuse for happening, but regardless of what injustices have been done to you why do you hold on to such negativity? Its natural to feel anger and hatred...they are emotions that we are hardwired to have, just like happiness and joy. But we have a choice to let them go before they consume us and take the joyful moments away, strip the happy thoughts and memories from us. We all have that choice. If you let a small scratch or cut on your arm or leg get infected and grow into a more serious, gangrenous wound, it will start to spread to and affect more of your body. It will start to affect more than just the little cut it once was. If you don't deal with it when its small, giving it the attention it needs to be taken care of when it first happens, and you let it fester and ignore it, it WILL get worse, more painful, and continue to effect you more and more. Eventually, if left long enough, it could need to be amputated...forcing you to either cut it off and get rid of it, or if you chose not to, it could ultimately take your life....No one chooses that from the beginning, at least not consciously, but by ignoring or pushing it away when it happens doesn't make it go away. Same is true with hatred. It hurts when we've been wronged. And its easy to not deal with it because it hurts dealing with painful things, but if you push it away and let it fester in you for weeks, months, years, or even decades it WILL resurface as something so fierce you won't even recognize it as the thing it once was. Deal with it and be done...don't hold on to hate.


I have been doing a lot of thinking about this school that I am attending and it has been a huge struggle for me and very daunting to deal with this knee injury that is largely unknown and confusing. It doesn't make sense, but I’m facing it and I’m choosing to do everything that I can to meet it head on not become the victim and feel sorry for myself, but rather use this to become a stronger person, a stronger leader. I may ultimately fail in what I set out to do, but my perceived end point isn't the only thing that drives me. The experiences I am gaining, the trials I am facing, and the strength which I am forming are what is ultimately going to guarantee my success. What that success means or looks like specifically, I can't put into words right now, but I’m going for it full tilt...and I couldn't do it if I stayed stuck on being the victim, thinking of what could be if I wasn't injured...because this is what is, nothing else....i choose my reality and my reality is I am on a flight to Chile to meet up with 4 other amazing guys all training to be awesome mountain guides! I will do the best that I am possibly capable, I will keep a good positive attitude and I will share the love of that I have to share because that is what I choose!

12,000 days

Do you know how many days you've lived? If you don't, its easy to figure out. Or at least you can get a general idea. Doing math in my head is pretty general and sometimes can be WAAY off, but without trying to figure it out to a perfect exact number, I've lived roughly 12,000 days. Most of those days i wouldn't be able to tell you what i did. They just passed away without being memorable...

Now, how many days have you actually LIVED? I've been alive for about 12,000 days but how many of those have I lived? How many did i waste feeling sorry for myself? and how many did i take for granted because I thought that "tomorrow is another day" and today isn't worth salvaging? We don't get those days back...once they are gone, they're gone. We only live for a certain amount of days...each is precious and each has the potential to be memorable and great in their own respects. BUT we have to live them in order for this to happen.

The past is the past. It cannot be changed, would you agree? What has happened is done. There's no going back...sure, we can learn from the past, our past, others' past... but how about making our own mistakes, learning lessons for ourselves? What if we could go back? would you? why? do you regret decisions you've made? or are you able to accept them as what they are and learn from them, good or bad, and move forward? are you able to live in the NOW and not get stuck in the what ifs of what could have been? Or are you constantly striving towards, planning for and dreaming of the future...of what hasn't come?

Learning from the past is smart, and planning for the future is wise, but where do you draw the line and actually be present in the present? Some would argue that this is a silly, immature way to live, but it'll never come again and if you waste it its gone. However you choose to live your life is up to you and you alone. Are you satisfied with how your life is right now? if an asteroid crashed into you wherever you happen to be right now would you feel as though you lived your life? Or would you be dissapointed that you didn't get to do something, or say something to someone?

Stop making excuses and live your life today.

On June 10, 2010 my niece, Rebecca Faith, was born. She was born with health issues that ultimately took her life 18 months later. She never walked, never talked, never tasted real food (other than homemade vanilla ice cream on her first birthday). She wasn't consumed with her choices in the past, how she had been treated, or what she would do in her life to come...

The doctors gave her less than a year to live and she beat that! Her life is an inspiration for me to make the most of my life, make the most of the choices that I choose. And its a big reminder that i have been given the richness to experience life as I am right now! Life is so precious and yet so fragile and so many of us take so much of it for granted...enjoy being able to taste your food, enjoy the smell of rain, fresh cut grass, and burnt toast. Enjoy feeling rain on your skin, the sun burning your neck, and the heat of a campfire on your shins. Don't take anything for granted. Be yourself for your reasons, not someone somebody else tells you to be for their reasons. Experience emotion, don't suppress it...it helps us feel alive in this small silly world we are in. Choose things that make you happy or sad but choose them; don't just let them happen...Love on everyone you come into contact with...there's no room for hate.

Live your life...don't just be alive.



"I love you little Becky! Thank you for sharing your moments with me!"

An Obituary...(of sorts)

My car, my beloved 1995 Subaru Legacy station wagon, has sold. It has a nice new college aged girl to look after

My emotions are mixed. On one had, I loved that little car despite its little quirks and gimmicks and am sad to see it go. It served me well travelling across many states, on washboarded backcountry roads, up and down mountain passes so I could get to work, the trailhead or the ski hills, and performed with little problems time and time again when I packed it tetris style to its maximum capacity moving around in my classic nomadic style. I loved that car, it was a fantastic car to own and drive!

On the other hand, I was frustrated to no end with that POS car despite how much I loved it. It struggled, sometimes, to chug up even the littlest of hills causing road rage from people stuck behind me. I would bottom out over potholes that wouldn't have phased a lowrider. I couldn't roll down my window on 100 degree days to simply feel a breeze on my face. It leaked oil to the point of seeming like it had an engine fire billowing smoke from under the hood causing people to rush over to me to inform me that my car was smoking! "Yes, I am aware," as if I didn't see the cloud of smoke right in front of me!

BUT.... overall, I will miss that car. Despite its short comings, it was the best car I could have owned at that time of my life. I am grateful for its persistence to take me to places I wouldn't have been able to access with out it. I am thankful and sad. Sad to know that when I return home, it won't be sitting there waiting for me. Thankful that the next owner will have her own stories to make with it. She will have a car that will be reliable, functional and fun! She is excited and I am excited.

Big thanks to my dad for putting in the leg work of selling my beloved! Thanks dad!

You little Suby, you will be missed, we traveled far and wide together and you will never be forgotten or replaced....